de agony of da-feet

How many pairs of shoes is too many pairs of shoes?

Yesterday, I was researching something for work when I stumbled upon - okay, I purposely took a break and went to - my favorite online shoe website, Zappos.com. I saw the CUTEST platform shoes that...well...I just HAD to have. Heck, they were only $35 and they were WAY adorable. Flowered platform soles. Tan to match either jeans or my white pants for the summer. Just high enough to make me taller. But just as I clicked on the "purchase" button, I had a sudden pang of "do I really NEED these shoes, or do I just WANT these shoes?" Tough call. Easy to justify the latter, but I thought I should be a big girl and sit on this for a day. If the urge was still strong this morning, I was going to buy these shoes, darn it!

So last night I decided to figure out how many shoes I actually owned. Stacked neatly in my closet are piles of shoe boxes. 25 on the floor. Not bad...I only have 25 pairs of shoes! Why that's nothing for a working woman in 2006! But then I remembered...wait...I have more under the bed. 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31. 31 Pairs of shoes. Oops...and about 20 pairs in California (for those of you who don't know, I work in Michigan, but my home is California). So let's call it 51 pairs of shoes. Still not a crime. Not a sin. No Imelda Marcos am I.

I mean, every pair of shoes I have, I actually NEED, right? Some are for winter, some are for summer, some are for dress-up, some are for jogging (even though I haven't actually BEEN jogging since the ninth grade). And what about the rain boots!?!? I really needed those rain boots! What if I'm stuck in a storm somewhere and - well - have to prepare sandbags during a hurricane! I need those cute, flowered rainboots!

And let's face it, half of my shoes are from Payless. Who can pass up the B.O.G.O. (buy one get one half off) offer that every summer brings? Not I! So it's not like I've spent millions on my 51 pairs of shoes. I have been frugal in the past. What's an extra $35 added to the mix?

What to do...what to do...what to do...

Afterall, as the website says, they're a "stylish platform slide that's perfect for the warm weather." They have a "lightly padded footbed" and "gorgeous floral detailing along the heel and base." How can I pass up gorgeous floral detailing along the heel and base?!?!? I would be doing the entire shoe industry an injustice if I chose to do so!

So I sit here at my computer this morning, staring at the shoes online, ready to spend the $35 bucks to get these shoes. I need a sign. I need divine intervention. WWPD?*

*What would Paris do?

19 down...10 to go

Tomorrow will be day one of week fourteen of my adventure in Weight Watchers. I've lost 19 pounds (as of last Wednesday) and have about 10 more to go. Technically I have 7, but I'd like a couple of pounds to play with so that if I end up eating Tater Tots or a Fatburger, it won't throw me into a guilty tailspin. REALLY technically I have about 20 to go, in order to look like my friends in L.A. (picture Heather Locklear, Denise Richards, Pam Anderson). In bikinis they look amazing. My goal is to look like them in a bikini. Heck, my goal is to look like them in a PARKA! Anything. I just want stick legs and no cellulite and a good butt and arms that don't flap in the wind. Shit...maybe it's not even possible. I don't know. But I do know that I'm gonna try, darn it.

I sometimes think about the fact that I'm over 40 and married and, really, the weight thing shouldn't even matter to me. Isn't that the way it goes? But it matters. For some reason - maybe it's a midlife crisis or something - I have felt the need to try to look better. Like it's my last chance before becoming a granny. With menopause looming behind a tree just around the corner somewhere, I am desperate to get the last ounce of "pretty" out of myself before it all goes down the drain. I mean, what if my husband suddenly dumps me and I'm back out on the market? There is no way on God's Green Earth that I'd let a man see me naked. No way. I don't even let me see myself naked at this point. It's too frightening. So maybe this weight loss thing is an insurance policy just in case I'm dumped and find myself cavorting with my own little Ashton Kutcher somewhere. Look at Demi. My age. Thin. Shiny hair.

That's my next project: shiny hair.

* For anyone who is keeping track, as of January 2007, I have officially lost 35 pounds! So, yes, I did lose the above aforementioned 10 pounds, plus another 6 to boot! Still would like to lose a couple of more, but overall, I have reached my goal! THANK YOU WEIGHT WATCHERS!

this whole ford gay thing

First, the story. If you haven't read it yet, click on the link below:

FORD SALES HIT BY GAY AD PROTEST

Why can't people just mind their own business, stick to their own lives, and stop worrying about people's sexual orientation? Listening to one of the talk radio shows this morning on our station, a caller - who agreed with the protest - said (INSERT STUPID DUMB GUY ACCENT HERE), "Why should I - and my family - be forced to follow this gay lifestyle? When it starts affecting me and my kids and the gay agenda gets shoved down our throats, then it becomes MY business."

I don't even want to GO THERE with the "shove it down our throats" comment. But I chuckle, nonetheless.

How a pastor can preach against a company because they choose to advertise to a segmented market is beyond me. How can we be one with God, when we can't be one with all of God's children? Once again, the hypocrisy that abounds in organized religion never fails to astound me.

I just can't believe there are narrow-minded people like this living in 2006. I mean, I know they're out there. It's just that every time something like this comes up, I am shocked all over again.

I personally praise Ford. Heck, I might even buy a Ford. Then I will pick up a copy of "The Bird Cage" and stop by the guy's house who called our station this morning. Maybe I can interest him and his family in a little movie night tonight.

of course...the plague in la!

Just when I resigned myself to believing that "House" was only a TV show and the diseases presented every week couldn't POSSIBLY really happen to normal people like myself, I clicked on Yahoo this afternoon, only to see this headline:

LOS ANGELES WOMAN HAS RARE CASE OF BUBONIC PLAGUE

Oh...my...GOD! Plague. From Fleas. From Dogs. And Cats. I'm screwed. Totally screwed. I have three dogs and a cat - all of whom sleep in bed with my husband and I. Our fruit trees are crawling with rats every dusk (see related story below about the mystery rat in our walls). The dogs chase the rats. The cats EAT the rats. The rats have fleas. The rats carry bubonic plague.

This is not good news for a hypochondriac like myself. I have never been a fan of pesticides like "Advantage" or "Frontline" but I think I'll immediately start my dogs and cat on a program, as well as douse the yard with Nematodes (great way to naturally rid the yard of fleas). Other than that, I am going to be donning a plastic suit for the rest of the year until this plague thing is under control. Or at least until I can be convinced that this was an isolated case.

Why did it have to be L.A.? Why?????

so much for resolutions

Okay, so much for writing in my Blog every day! Yikes! I guess that resolution didn't go over very well.

So here's my new resolution. I resolve not to resolve to write something every day! How's that????? Promise to write something soon.

xo

big girl books

I'm reading a book called Gilead. It was written by Marilynne Robinson. After barreling through a string of trashy chic-lit fiction (Devil Wears Prada, Everyone Worth Knowing, The Starter Wife, The Assistants, The Psycho Ex Game) I decided to smarten up and actually attempt to read a Pulitzer Prize winning book.

The difference between chic-lit and Pulitzer Prize literature is - well - it takes a lot longer to read the latter. I actually have to THINK about what the author is writing.

That said, I'm only on page 16 of Gilead. And I started three days ago. Considering the fact that I can read a 400-page trash novel in a day and a half, I'd say I'm off to a very good start. Wouldn't you? But hey, the author took 24 years to write this book - her second novel (in all fairness she had some non-fiction inbetween). So I'm not that far behind her.

Well, I don't have a formal "book report" for any of you yet, but I did find a great excerpt that I wanted to share. At least to me, it hit home. Perhaps it will touch some of you, too:

"A little too much anger, too often or at the wrong time, can destroy more than you would ever imagine. Above all, mind what you say. "Behold how much wood is kindled by how small a fire, and the tongue is a fire" - that's the truth."

You don't get lines like that in The Devil Wears Prada.

So - at the rate I'm going - I should be done with this 247 page book by 2008. Then I'll write a full review. Meanwhile, if you're not reading something right now...get a book. It's a great way to get lost in a world that isn't your own.

rats! foiled again!!

Teddy and I have a mouse in our house. We don't know where it is, or if it comes and goes, but every morning at around 3:30 it 'goes to work.' It starts with a 'scratch, scratch, scratch, scratch,' then escalates to a 'bite, bite, scratch, scratch, bite.'

Because we don't really know if it's in our attic, our walls, or simply on the outside trying to gnaw its way in, our only remedy thus far for getting rid of the little guy is to pound loudly on the wall. We've also tried turning on the attic fan, hoping to scare him off.

Each method works. At least for that moment in time. But like clockwork, he-slash-she returns every morning to get to the business at hand. There must be something really tasty he's trying to get to in our house. Perhaps a loose Cheetoh or two that found its way under our bed.

Teddy is usually in charge of the wall pounding. However, the other night - not wanting to wake him - I thought I'd try to sound the warning bell myself. Groggy, and a bit out of it, I quietly got out of bed. I scrunched up my best fightin' fist and wailed away at the wall. Teddy suddenly sprung up in bed holding his heart, thinking that we were having an earthquake or something. Oops. So much for trying not to disturb him! Note to self: In future, tap husband gently on shoulder to awaken when rat begins his work at night.

Because our yard is full of fruit trees, the 'tree rats' love to hang out at our place. Each night at dusk, they can be seen running along the wires, going in and out of trees, with grapefruits or oranges or avocados in their mouths. It's sort of like the 405/101 interchange at rush hour. They're all over the neighborhood (and all over L.A. for that matter) so I don't really know how we can prevent them from entering our yard. I would NEVER dream of killing them, so I'm looking for alternative ways of urging them to seek their meals elsewhere. If anyone knows of a humane way to 'relocate' these rodents, I'd love to hear from you.

My friend, Jackie, who is a saint to all living, breathing creatures, uses the live trapping / relocating method. She recently told me a story about trapping a rat late at night, deciding to relocate it in the morning. When she woke up, she discovered that the rat had babies overnight! So what would any animal-loving, caring person do in this case? She made mommy and her babies a nice little nest and kept them until the babies were weaned. Then she released them into the world to live their little mousy-mouse lives. I don't know if I'd go that far, but I like the story, nonetheless.

All of this rambling about mice and rats was triggered by a story I read in the paper this morning about a man who tried to dispose of a mouse that made its way into his house by throwing it into a pile of burning leaves. The blazing mouse - God bless him - ran back into the mean man's house and set his house on fire!

Read Man & Mouse Story Here.

After reading this, I now know that these little guys are smarter than we give them credit for. So perhaps we'll just continue knocking until we can find a way to lure them away from our house for good. Maybe a porterhouse steak in the middle of the cul de sac will do the trick?

Until tomorrow, remember, "The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese."

in memory of zeke andreadis

I found this picture today in my files and it reminded me of our cat, Zeke, who died on August 23, 2005. He was about 17 when he died. Every time I come back to L.A. to visit I forget that he's not here anymore and get sad all over again.

His ashes sit next to my bed with his photo and pawprint. When I close my eyes at night I pretend that he is still sleeping in my arms, purring me to sleep.

Zeke was one of those great cats who was really more like a dog. Dogs, cats, people - everyone loved him and he loved everyone. He was cool, calm and collected. A truly amazing kitty.

So, Zeke, if you are listening, we still think about you every day and will always keep you close to our hearts!

for every action...there's an idiot

Why do I even bother getting riled up about these guys?

First it was Jerry Falwell and his comments about Tinky Winky being gay simply because he had a penchant for handbags. Oooh, that one got me really steamed.

Now The Rev. Pat Robertson is blaming Prime Minister Ariel Sharon's massive stroke on...God??? Seriously. Robertson believes that - because Sharon had the Israelis withdraw from Gaza - he has brought on "God's enmity." (Okay, so I had to look up 'enmity.' It means deep-seated dislike or ill-will. Hatred.) Nice.

On Robertson's 700 Club broadcast (and people actually watch this show), he also noted that Prime Minister Yitzhak Rabin was assassinated (by God, of course) because he signed the Oslo peace accords in 1993. Go figure. He says it's God's way of saying "This land belongs to me, you better leave it alone!"

I think this is my favorite part of the story, though, as taken from CNN.com:

"According to The Associated Press, Robertson spokeswoman Angell Watts said of people who criticized the comments: "What they're basically saying is, 'How dare Pat Robertson quote the Bible?'"

"This is what the word of God says," Watts told the AP. "This is nothing new to the Christian community.""

I am one more inch closer to turning in my Christian Membership Card. Can I be Bat Mitzvahed at 43?

I truly have no comment on this one. Really, I don't. Okay, so maybe one. Let's not forget that this is the same group of folks who blamed Hurricane Katrina on the loose morality of the people in New Orleans and the Gulf Coast. See ridiculous editorial here. David Crowe, the article's author writes, "Katrina was an act of God upon a sin-loving and rebellious nation, a warning to all who foolishly and arrogantly believe there is no God, and that if He did exist, "would not have done such a thing!" It is also a serious call to repent, to turn away from our wicked ways, from the heart of a loving Father."

Um...okay.

I'd really rather talk about Paris Hilton getting sued by the Diamond Heiress/Actress (why is everyone a /Actress? Singer/Actress. Model/Actress. World Leader/Actress) for dissing her in the New York Post. The paper reported that Zeta Graff (not to be confused with Zeta-Jones) — who once dated Hilton's then-fiancee, Greek shipping heir (and why is everyone suddenly a 'Greek Shipping Heir'?) Paris Latsis — went "berserk" at the nightclub, tried to strangle Hilton and attempted to steal her diamond necklace. Full story here. My first question is, why would a diamond heiress want to steal a diamond necklace? And my second question is, why am I even glorifying any of this garbage with 5 minutes of my time?

That said, I'm getting on with my day.

Until tomorrow, remember, if your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise.

me thinks thou protesteth too much

It seems that Lonnie Latham, a senior pastor at the South Tulsa Baptist Church in Oklahoma (and an executive committee member of the Southern Baptist Convention - which is the nation's largest Protestant denomination) was looking for a little hanky-panky, and propositioned a plainclothes MALE cop outside a hotel. His response? "I was set up. I was in the area pastoring to police."

Hmmm...so that's what they're calling it these days?

A convention directive supported by Latham urges fellow church members to minister to gays and lesbians (ahem!) telling them they can become heterosexual "If they accept Jesus Christ as their savior and reject their 'sinful, destructive lifestyle.'" Let's see...who could make a God-fearing man turn to another man for a little nookie-nookie? Could it be...SATAN?????

Tsk Tsk Tsk. Pie in the face, anyone??

what i did on my christmas vacation

One of the greatest things about the holiday season in L.A. (at least as far as I'm concerned) is spending Christmas Eve in Toluca Lake waiting for the 'Caroling Truck' to arrive. Thanks to our friend, Sherry, we have been a part of this wonderful tradition for three years now. The Caroling Truck is a semi-truck converted to a 'Holiday on Wheels' complete with carolers and bubbles and a parade of Santa's Helpers twirling batons following behind. If you ever have a chance to visit L.A. during the holidays, cop a seat somewhere on the streets of Toluca Lake on Christmas Eve and follow the sounds of the carolers. It's really magic!

Here is a photo of the front of the truck (as taken with my cell phone while the truck was moving). For a whole slew of (way better) photos and back-story on the Caroling Truck, click here: The Christmas Caroling Truck Website

me!

This is me. Lisa Goich-Andreadis. Well, it's me a few years ago, but who's counting?

I still look basically the same. I used to wear bangs because they suited my face. Now I wear them because they cover the forehead wrinkles and they're cheaper than Botox.

I obviously took this photo before the onset of 'America's Next Top Model.' Otherwise, I would have known better than to have rested my head atop my hand like a senior photo or something.

Oh well. It'll do. As soon as I lose the 25 pounds I'm shooting for in 2006, I'll post a full body shot!

why look at me...i'm blogging!

Okay, so I am a little late with the first post of 2006. Had I truly been on top of things, I would have had this entry in by January 1st. Oh well...I haven't lost that 25 pounds yet, either!

I'm creating this blog simply to get myself writing. Writing, writing, writing. And doing other creative things that I seemed to have put on hold this past year. If by January 2007 I have stayed with this thing, I will have considered it a success.

So stop by now and then and see what's new. I promise to try to keep you entertained, informed or, at the very least, in touch with what I've been up to.

Happy New Year!